


The Extent to Which a Demon can Love

by VainVariety



Category: Helltaker (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Comfort, F/F, Forbidden Love, Kissing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-01
Updated: 2021-02-03
Packaged: 2021-03-12 17:01:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,514
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29138970
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VainVariety/pseuds/VainVariety
Summary: Love is in the air... Sort of.
Relationships: Azazel/Lucifer (Helltaker), Beelzebub/Justice (Helltaker), Modeus/Judgement (Helltaker)
Comments: 14
Kudos: 39





	1. Azazel x Lucifer: I Want a Letter to Read

**Author's Note:**

> Day 1 of Creativepromptsforwriting's February Prompts:  
> Love letter
> 
> ( WARNING: Religious Trauma, Internalized Homophobia )

Another paper scraped and tossed into the waste bin.It didn’t make it in, along with the last three, but Azazel didn’t bother to fix it.

Usually, she was so good with her words!She was always praised by her superiors for what a strong writer she was— So skilled and talented with whatever she wrote, it was almost as though she could persuade the masses with a single stroke of her pen and a smile.

So why was this so hard?

It was getting dark out.The yellow light from the lamp had her convinced it was still day time, though now it was her only light source.Her eyes stung.A quick swipe against them with her fingers and shaking off her unease, she got back to work.

_For so long I have asked myself, is it wrong to love a woman as a man would?If it were God’s creation, then surely there is no sin within it._

_You must forgive me— being around humans so long has plagued my thought, I am merely writing this down for my own convincing.I’m sure you already know this._

The last part sounded unnecessary.It was rolled into another ball and tossed aside.Writing in pen surely had it’s perks… Not.

Her elbows hit the desk and her head fell into her palms.This was stupid.She was naive, there was no way she harbored such feelings for a woman.No, not at all.

For so long, she was taught that Adam and Eve was the ideal couple.It was suggested by a few archangels that there was nothing wrong with the love of the same gender, but it was merely that.A suggestion.Nothing permanent, nothing she could look at and cite that such feelings were okay.

Human rhetoric only made it worse.Though she had been here a short time, she had caught ear that several humans would chant, “Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve”.In her mind, there was no wrong with a man named Adam and Steve being in love and uniting in holy matrimony.That was their business, and each of them had their own relationship with God.

But an angel and a demon?It was laughable and Azazel wasn’t humored.

“Why are you crying?”

She was crying?The angel sniffed and lifted her head from her hands.Soaked, and now acutely aware of how she hiccuped.A hand on her shoulder told her that it was the Helltaker by her side.

Only he had hands that size.

Her hands fussed to smear her tears away and nod, uttering reassurance that she was fine.His hand left her body, but squatted beside her chair.He was so tall, that man, his head went up to her chest.

“What’s wrong Azazel?”She tried to focus on anything else.The moon— It was out already?— or the fluorescent light from the kitchen.Oh, how it reminded her of…

Her lip trembled, he held his arms out to her.The angel could no longer fight against his generosity and nearly fell off her seat into his arms, sniveling and whimpering into his shoulder.He held her tight with gentle shushes and a hand up and down her back.But while he shushed her, he urged her to let it all out as well.

She wasn’t sure she wanted to, restraining herself to quiet quivers that wouldn’t wake anybody else up.If her sobs were to wake up Zdrada, she would weep for a different reason.

Azazel had no clue how much time had passed until her body stopped shaking and fell silent, sniffling back another sob.He was so kind to her, so patient and gentle… Surely, this should be the kind of attraction she should hold for a man.

Her heart did not ache for his attention like it did her’s.

The Helltaker pulled back, thumbs swiping away any remaining tears on her cheeks.He told her that he would fetch her a blanket and a warm drink.Off he went, her thoughts kept her company in his absence.

Could she ever bring herself to love a man?The Helltaker was very attractive— athletic and tall, protective and very kind.She liked those qualities in a suitor, but she couldn’t get her out of her mind.

This demon, the one who has been so cruel to her from the start, has shown kindness in her disdain.It was meant to protect her, she came to learn, her sharp words were meant to help her adjust to such a different environment.

From day one, Azazel followed her advice to the exact detail.It worked out well for her, and being praised for doing so well made her day.No, actually, her week, maybe even her month.Yes, that sounded right.

The Helltaker returned, wrapping a plush blanket around her shoulders and pushing a warm cup of cocoa into her hands, leading her to the couch and sitting beside her.Azazel took a sip and decided she would never tire of human food.

The silence between them wasn’t uncomfortable, she took note of how small her knees looked compared to his.The Helltaker broke it with the gentlest of whispers, “Do you want to talk about it?”

She stared into her mug, clearing her throat to allow her words room to come through.“Do you think I’m a bad person?”

“What?— Azazel, never.You’re such a sweet person, what’s makes you say that?”

Her finger rubbed the etchings along the brim of the mug.“I feel like I am.”

His hand grabbed her knee, giving it a supportive squeeze before the silence remained.Azazel took another sip, allowing the warmth of the blanket to ease the notion that she was tired.

“Is it wrong for a woman to love a woman?Like, as though a man would love a woman.”The Helltaker seemed to get a sense what this was about.

“Not at all.There’s nothing wrong with that.”

“I don’t know if I could ever love a man—“ She paused, “— Well, maybe I could, I don’t know, maybe I haven’t found the right man yet.”

“It’s okay to only like women, Azazel.If you don’t love guys, then you don’t love guys.It’s better not to force it.”

She took a long drink from the mug this time.Something inside of her felt as thought she already knew this, but hearing it from someone else wasn’t bad.

“How would you react if you met, let’s say, a man who only loved men?”He posed, she pursed her lips, only now looking him in the eye.

“I would see no issue with it.”

“Right.So now, I want you to treat yourself with the same kindness.It’s no different for you.”He was smiling now, but it truly wasn’t the same.

“Even if I love a demon?”

“Even if you love a demon.”

If only it were that easy.

Azazel thanked him for his therapy.He checked in with her a few more times before returning to his room.She finished the last of her drink and shuffled back over to her desk.

_Love is strange.For others to ridicule it truly suggests the presence of hate.Can love exist without hate?Unfortunately, it must be so, for we would not know love without hatred._

_I know for certain that I do not hate you. If I may be so bold, I adore you.You enjoy structure and stability above all else and work hard to maintain order for all.I admire your dedication to what you do, and watching you in your element makes me wonder if there’s a limit to how much a person can love another._

_You turn everything you do into an art form and there is nothing I would not give to be your muse._

This was cheesy.Her pen drummed against the desk, trying to think how to reword this.

_I hope this letter finds you well, I merely ask for you to let me admire you from afar.No matter how much I yearn, I know we are never meant to be.Maybe there will be a day I will muster the wit to be upfront with you.Until then, dearest Lucifer, please continue to look out for me._

Her pen stopped in its tracks as she came to the realization that this letter must never reach her hands.But she could not find the energy to throw it out.

_We are never meant to be._

The very notion made her throat constrict.There was no other way around it.Her head laid upon the paper, closing her eyes with a sigh.

Would God show her mercy?Just this once?Surely He was still watching her, in this moment, would he grant her this one pleasure?She had been the most loyal servant to Him and will continue to be, perhaps he shall let her hard work be rewarded just this once.

Just this once.

Please.

* * *

The scent of pancakes woke her from her slumber.The sun was up, and picking up her head she saw that her letter was gone.

Maybe it was all a dream, one that made her stomach growl.The angel stood, curling her blanket snug over her shoulders and arching her back in a stretch.The chair made her muscles ache.

In the kitchen was Lucifer, bustling away with a batch of pancakes.It was Azazel’s cue to leave— she didn’t like anyone else in the kitchen with her— but her presence didn’t go unnoticed.

“Good morning, Azazel.”

“Oh!You scared me, Good morning, your majesty.”The angel weakly smiled, watching how her tail flicked around as she worked.Busy, yet focused.Every part of her was absorbed by her task, yet she still made some time for her.

Azazel didn’t notice the huge smile spread across her face.

“Why don’t you have a seat?They’re almost finished.”

She never said that to anyone.It took her a moment to respond, caught by the demon before her who shot a warning glance.The angel was quicker.“Thank you, your majesty!That’s so kind of you.”Her gratitude was carried out with a laugh, seating herself at her regular seat and noticed in place of a plate was a sheet of paper, written upon in red ink.

Her heart sunk.

_Dear Azazel,_

_Your wants and desires are not selfish, nor are they one sided.You have caught me off guard and for that I congratulate you.Be patient and kind to yourself, address me with those same words when you are ready to face them._

_Anything is possible if you will it to be._

_With love,_

_Lucifer._

Lucifer came up behind the angel to wrap her arms around her neck, her cheek pressing against the other’s cheek.

“It’s hard,”She began, “to be scorned for something no fault of your own.But to come to terms with it you must forgive yourself, my little billy.” The Queen pressed a kiss against the angel’s cheek, giving her one last squeeze before serving her a plate of blueberry pancakes.

Azazel’s favorite.


	2. Modeus x Judgement: Birdwatching

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Day 2: Birds

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for publishing this for a day late! I was doing homework all day yesterday, expect two chapters today :-)

“WHAT DO YOU MEAN THAT’S A MOURNING DOVE?THAT’S A CARDINAL, OBVIOUSLY!”

“No, it’s not.”Modeus snapped and shoved the field guide into Judgement’s face, pointing to the picture of the female cardinal.“ _That’s_ a cardinal.They’re both brown, but they’re not the same.”

“W-WELL… THEY OUGHT TO BE!”

Modeus sniffed and turned her nose up at the other, who suggested birdwatching over people watching.Judgement had chained Modeus to a garden chair, who insisted she get a good look at the new neighbors, perhaps a little too intimately.They couldn’t be causing a lot of trouble in the human realm.This wasn’t Hell, it was a grassy backyard with a rotting brown fence and a few trees.

On the fence perched the same bird they squabbled over, soon joined by a red bird of similar stature.Judgement spun to face Modeus, pointing a claw at the red one and demanding to know which one that was.The two of them flew off before Modeus could speak.The lust demon’s tail lashed around the air, slamming the book shut in her hands.

“It was a male cardinal, _I think_.I wouldn’t know, ‘cause you scared them off.”Modeus sneered, watching Judgement throw her arms up to the sky.

“SEEMS LIKE I CAN’T DO ANYTHING RIGHT, CAN I, PRINCESS?”The nickname made Modeus’s eyes go wide.The lashing stopped, and the look in her eye chilled Judgement to her core.

“I’m your what?”

“YOU’RE NOT MY **ANYTHING**!”Judgement wagged a finger in warning at the other, who she swore was drooling now.

“I’m a princess?”She clarified, “Am I a pretty princess?Do you think I’m pretty?”

“NO!NO NO NO NO!SHUT UP!”Judgement clasped her hands over her ears and stomped around the backyard to cool off some steam.

There were only so many things she could try with Modeus.Violence was her persuasion of choice, but any violence she showed was instantly countered with some sort of wanting.It made her job harder when she was getting hot and bothered by her work.

Not only that, but everything she tried to say to shut Modeus up also got them riled up.If only Justice were here, they wouldn’t have _any_ issue with this twat!It was made worse when her hands fell from her ears she noticed the other had shut up.

Her work would’ve been done if it weren’t for the dampened expression on the restrained demon’s face.Her job was done, but that face was very unbecoming of her.

… Whatever.

Judgement resumed her position, keeping a close eye on her captive.But the gloom plastered on the other’s face showed no sign of changing.Judgement watched how Modeus’s eyes watched the grass on the ground, her feet idly fiddling with each other and shoulders heaving a deep sigh.It irked the High Prosecutor, especially watching her twiddle with her thumbs.Something was clearly on her mind and there was something that she wanted to say.

Judgement’s foot tapped against the ground with impatience, eyeing as the red bird from earlier fluttered back down onto the fence.

“… WHAT’S WRONG?”She grumbled, hardly giving her the satisfaction of a glance.

Modeus sighed louder this time.

“DON’T PLAY COY WITH ME ALL OF A SUDDEN!WHEN SOMEONE ASKS YOU A QUESTION, YOU ANSWER.”Now her foot was stomping the ground, and that’s when her captive spoke up.

“You said I wasn’t pretty.”

“DID NOT!”

“Did too!”Modeus’s attention snapped towards the other with the most pitiful pout.“I asked you if you thought I was pretty and you said no.Am I ugly?”

“NO!”Judgement blurted out, a sudden heat filling her chest. “NO!NO, NO— T-THAT’S NOT WHAT I MEANT, ERM…”Modeus looked hopeful now, but that only made her answer more pressing.

She was forced to pick between a dismal captive and one who wouldn’t leave her alone.Neither was ideal.

“YOU’RE NOT UGLY—“

“But am I pretty?”Judgement was backed into a corner.The red cardinal glanced around and chirped for his lover.Modeus didn’t seem to care.

“YOU’RE— YOU’RE— YOU’RE P… Pretty, I guess.”She may have been forced to say it, but Modeus was quick to detect the truth in her words.The flush that came to her captor’s cheeks and the way her armored claws flexed open and shut as she looked for the words to say made her squirm with delight.

Judgement busied herself with the cardinal on the fence, now joined by his partner, who offered him a seed.

“What if that was us?”Modeus piped up.

“WHAT?”

“What if we kissed?”

Judgement dissipated the chains from around the other’s legs, and upon being freed, she threw her arms around the other’s neck.The High Prosecutor stumbled back with a squawk, insisting she didn’t want a kiss and that she wanted her to leave.Modeus was satisfied once she squared a firm kiss against the other’s cheek, dancing back inside and leaving the other to nurse her cheek with a list of questions.

Maybe Modeus wasn’t _so_ bad.


	3. Justice x Beelzebub: No One Can Hear You Here

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Day 3: Snowfall

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I headcanon Beelzebub as using fly/flyself pronouns, I tried to write fly with them to practice using neopronouns. I hope I did it right, haha.
> 
> And, of course, they/them Justice.

Lucifer seized Justice’s wrist.“What is that?”

“Babe, I can’t see.”

“Follow me.”The Queen lead her former High Prosecutor from the kitchen window towards the backdoor and onto the porch.

The sudden flake on their skin made them shudder.It was cold, and melted immediately on contact.They didn’t feel it until it was already there, and the nip of the winter air caused them to shrug their coat more snugly around their shoulders.

“Justice.It’s snowing.”Justice didn’t have to see the Queen to know there was a smile on her lips.They pressed a kiss against her cheek, who then immediately sprung from their grasp to run into the backyard.They stayed put and welcomed the sounds of her laughter, calling out to them to come join them in her new discovery.

Their hands found their way into their pockets, stepping onto the grass with a gentle crunch beneath their boot as Lucifer quite literally hopped over to them, hands on their shoulders and using them as a boost to jump higher.

“It’s snowing!It’s snowing— it’s snowing— it’s snowing— it’s snowing!”The Queen cheered, the demon having to hold their hands on her hips just to make sure their heads didn’t collide in all their excitement.This settled the other down, feet now firmly planted on the grounds and their mouths against each other.

It was a welcome warmth to the chill around them.

“Oh, I wish you could see this.”She sighed, hands cupping Justice’s face and drawing them in for another passionate kiss.

Justice wishes they could see it too.

Maybe that’s what compelled them to open the portal they so long ago sealed.And the presence of a visitor instantly summoned the same beast they had defeated.

“I want it back.”Justice growled.

“And a good evening to you too, High Prosecutor.”Beelzebub droned.“And _no_ , I can’t give back to you what you lost.I don’t own it.”

Justice knew this.That didn’t stop them from asking regardless, they would try just about anything to get it back.

* * *

There’s two things Justice and Beelzebub had in common: Neither of them would ever see snow, and they both were at fault.

Justice remembered the first time they met Beelzebub, who was planted by Lucifer’s side and dutifully retelling how fly managed to put a silly human in his place.Lucifer could care less, but they caught every word.

“And he fell to his knees and begged for my forgiveness!Would you believe that, darling dearest?”Beelzebub turned to flys superior, who nodded and uttered that it was very nice, caught up in a new policy she was about to put in place.Flys hands clapped together, laughing victoriously upon receiving even an ounce of approval.

Justice smiled and nodded, engaging fly to tell them more about it to give their Queen a bit of space.They caught how flys eyes darted around as fly continued to retell the story and how it made fly feel.The way fly moved was captivating— a flip of the cape, straightening the cuffs on flys jacket and nodding away, admiring flyself.

And fly had every right to.The brilliant shade of red clothed fly in just the right ways.The color truly brought out flys eyes and freckles, they had counted six the last time they remembered, or was it eight?

It was hard to tell, every time Beelzebub came to mind the former High Prosecutor was reminded of the same beast they contorted and inflated into.That was the last thing they saw.

* * *

“It was snowing today.”Justice finally confessed.

“And why should I care?”Beelzebub sneered.

“Don’t act so cold.I know that’s not how you are.”

“You act like you still care.I know you don’t.”The buzz inside the portal grew louder in their ears.The flies were getting angrier.It’s not as though they could escape, but getting too close meant Justice would be sucked into the land and subjected to the same fate fly was sentenced to serve.

Sometimes, they wondered if they would be able to see if they were there.

“I wish you could’ve seen it.”The High Prosecutor pressed, now picking something out from between their teeth with their pinky.“It felt real nice. Do you remember how you said you've always wanted to see it?”

Disturbed by such casualty, Beelzebub shut the portal with no warning.

That’s right.There was no going back to warm conversations anymore, there was no way they would be able to see fly in flys element, preaching and laughing and fiddling with flys accessories as they chattered about the most minimal experiences just to hear flyself talk.

Cerberus found out about the snow and rushed outside with a flurry of excited barks. Justice wasn’t excited anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for inserting Lucifer into everything. I'm obsessed. This is actually a lot sadder than I intended.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope to throw them all into a randomizer and write little ships based on the results. Here's to day one! :-)


End file.
